Little Deuce Poop

Overall Album Score: 6.7 out of 10

I am still anticipating The Beach Boys' albums finally starting to be awesome like I know they will be, but I have to review this little obstacle before that can happen. And "little obstacle" is all this album is. Forget that it exists.

This is a big old car commercial; every song is about cars ... some have even postulated this is the first concept album. If it is, then it isn't a very good concept album. On the same note, it's also a compilation, because it features songs that were already released in previous albums. Can a compilation album truly be considered a concept album? ... I'll let you mull that one over.

The best songs of the album are "Little Deuce Coupe" and "409." These have already been on previous Beach Boys albums I reviewed. The only new song I like is "Ballad of Ole Betsy" even though that's a huge disappointment compared to the mindbending ballads we were subjected to in Surfer Girl.

It's even arguable if this album was really recorded by the Beach Boys. This is more like a Beach Boys album if they were made out of wood (The Beech Boys). I know who the Beach Boys are but I have no clue who recorded this album. This is corporate-rock at its most calculating and malicious. They should never have been subjected to doing an album like this. Granted, it sold like hotcakes so it served its purpose, but most people who bought it had no integrity. ... Yeah, I'm talking to you, Baby Boomer.

Overall Album Score: 6.7 out of 10 (Is this the end of the Beach Boys??? ... No. It's a hiccough, though.)

Average Song Score: 7.0 (The best songs appeared on other albums. This song is one uninspired sterile rocker after another.)

Album Tilt: 6.5 (Sheer boredom. There's a few exceptions, but this work isn't even fun. Blah.)

Artist Rating: 6.5 (The Beach Boys caused global warming.)

Track Reviews

Little Deuce Coupe 8/10

...didn't I already review this song? ... Whatever. As I already said, this is a nice, catchy and simple song. It doesn't do much ... it's just a straight ahead rocker for white boys who wear sweaters and drive cars. They probably like the other songs on this album. Those jerks.

Ballad of Ole Betsy 8/10

This is a pleasant and pretty ballad though it's a far cry from the harmonic brilliance we already heard from these guys in "Little Surfer Girl." This one's mightily boring in comparison. At any rate, I like the melody even though it's instantly forgettable.

Be True To Your School 6/10

Sloppy. This would have made a great parody if it sounded a little more self-conscious. But ... this song is YUCK. The mixing is the first thing that strikes me about it. It's a rather heavily instrumented song with vocals going all over the place and a boogie-woogie horn section. But the balance just doesn't seem right. ... This is a real mess.

Crazy Car Cutie 6/10

Oh, we really needed another song with the '50s style chord progression. Damn it all!! I'm not even enjoying this in the sense that one would actually enjoy '50s music. I dismiss this song with one word: Whatever.

Cherry, Cherry Coupe 7/10

Better this time, but it still leaves much to be desired. The instrumentation is decent this time, and the chord progression is more like the Beach Boys. It's absolutely uninspiring, though. This song is for the moment ... I'm listening to this song right now, and I already forgot about it.

409 9/10

Easily, this is the best car song these guys came up with at this point. Those sleepy vocals and Chuck Berry guitar licks never get old. I love the melody!

Shut Down 7/10

Everyone who bought this album in the '60s is probably a dork. This is another sterile rocker with a merely OK melody that only dorks would like.

Spirit of America 6/10

The worst TV show in history is Happy Days. That's what this song reminds me of. Hey, wasn't that TV show supposed to take place in the 1950s? Then why is this song, that's not even worthy to have been sung by Potsie, on this album? Screw it!!!! (For the record, the worst TV show in history is actually MadTV, but I'm sure you knew that already.)

Our Car Club 7.5/10

Didn't I review this song already? ... That was one of the lesser songs from Surfer Girl, but it's a highlight on Little Deuce Coupe. How did that happen?

No-Go Showboat 6/10

No-go album! ... Despite that the song has a "chug-a-lug" rhythm, this song manages to be completely uncharacteristic of the Beach Boys and has an annoying melody. Something's not right!!!

A Young Man Gone 7/10

An a cappella song ... They have very pretty voices, but nobody can successfully carry a song without a compelling melody. If you did that, you'd might just as well prove Einstein's Theory of Relativity wrong.

Custom Machine 7/10

Good news! This is the last sterile song of the album! ... OK, it's the last song. I'm glad! ... About the song, nothing new to report.

Send me your excellent here.