Scary Monsters, Super Crepes

Overall Album Score: 9.0 out of 10

SCARRRRRY MONSTERS! SUPERRRRRRRRRRRRR CREEPS!

Oh ... sorry ... I was just enjoying David's latest and greatest album called Scary Monsters. (Yep folks, this is 1980. I bought some mousse, I've just thrown away my bellbottoms, and I had Donna Summer committed to a homeless shelter.) David Bowie, who I thought died or something ever since that space alien ... Piggy Trafalgar, I think was his name ... stopped possessing his body. And he's BACK! And he made this absolutely cool album that I just bought and showed to all my friends. Unfortunately, I don't have any friends, so I just went home and listened to it by myself. It's the totalliest, raddest thing on the planet Earth and everything inside of it, too! It has this really neat song on it that's really catchy .. um ... yeah! It goes like: "Do, a deer a female deer, Re a drop of golden ... gun? ... Um ... Me a name I call my elf. Fa a longer way to run! (Oh ... that's funny)." *BAM!* Aeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeougggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

I'm sorry about that folks. Apparently there was somebody at my keyboard writing my review of Scary Monsters by David Bowie, and I was like: Dude! No! I want to write this review! So I had to shoot him. Sorry for all the carnage. I hope I didn't get any on you.

Well, the reason I wanted to write this review myself was because ... DANG IT! ... this is one of my favorite rock albums! And, this is one of those inexplicable things but ... oh ... here comes a fond flashback ...

... It was in the March of 2002. I was going to Kansas State University then, and I hated every minute of it. (Don't get me started!) I was at home one weekend and before going back one fateful afternoon, I popped around Best Buy and decided to get a few albums before I left. One of them was This is Spinal Tap (I had just rented that film that weekend, and decided that I needed to own the soundtrack.) The other one was David Bowie's Scary Monsters. I became a Bowie fan after purchasing Ziggy Stardust about three months before that. Between these times, I had bought Heroes, Low, and Diamond Dogs, but these albums entirely failed to interest me much at the time. However, Scary Monsters interested me very much. Perhaps if it wasn't for this album, I wouldn't have become such a Bowie fan. (And ... as you might already know ... Bowie's my favorite rock star, and I doubt anybody's going to dethrone him.) All throughout that spring ... until sometime around late May when I bought George Harrison's All Things Must Pass, if you would ask me to put on my most-listened-to rock album, I would have wholeheartedly put on Scary Monsters. I took this album everywhere, and listened to it very frequently.

So ... yes ... this album does hold some personal value for me. And, even though I understand its flaws and shortcomings, I still put it on top of my list of favorite albums of mine.

The shortcomings:

"Scream Like a Baby." Not the world's best song, certainly. Also, one would probably have to strain themselves to like "Kingdom Come," as well. "Fashion" is a song that might cause some people problems as well, as it is basically a disco song. Some people also seem to have a hard time liking "Because You're Young," as well. I'm not sure why.

The non-shortcomings:

I like "Fashion," though. It's weirder than you're average disco song ... it even makes fun of trends. Can't really complain about that. Other than those songs aforementioned, everything else on here is absolute gold! David Bowie jumps on the New Romantic/New Wave bandwagon at this point in his career ... (Doesn't he look almost EXACTLY like David Sylvian and ... that Duran Duran guy?) Ask me, and I'll tell you that the early 80's New Romantic/New Wave movement was one of rock's last gasps of brilliancy. At the early age of 1980, Bowie was at the helm of that movement, as well! (And I have a theory that both Japan and Duran Duran used him as a model when they started.)

"Ashes to Ashes" is probably my favorite track out of here. It's an utterly catchy song that even provides a closer to David's famous song about Major Tom of "The Space Oddity." Of course, it's not as good as that song, but it's most definitely a worthy sequel. "Scary Monsters," the title track, is also a mentionable highlight of the album. ... Oh, and "It's No Game" ... and ... heck! I like all of these songs! Except for "Scream Like a Baby." But that song isn't really all that bad.

Unfortunately for you and for me, this was David Bowie's last great album. *Sniff* ... that is until his comeback of sorts in the late 90's. Oh well! ... Three years from this point, he would bleach his hair blonde and add his name to the roster of mega 80's pop stars. Unfortunately, this move also coincided with a major artistic slump! ... On the bright side, however, he was one of the most bearable and interesting mega 80's pop stars among his contemporaries. Oh yeah. And he was in that Jim Henson movie, too. That was cool.

Overall Album Score: 9.0 out of 10 (Doesn't it give one an insecure feeling about one's taste when one of one's most favorite albums doesn't get a perfect score on one's scale? It sure does! Nevertheless, this is David Bowie's last brilliant album that he would put out for another 20 years, unfortunately.)

Average Song Score: 9.0 (If every song was like the first six, then we would have had one major doozie on our hands! As it stands, it's a set of delightfully frigged out tracks!)

Album Tilt: 9.0 (I enjoy this album like nobody's business! Though I am perfectly willing to admit that the album's second half is a little weak.)

Artist Rating: 9.0 (Yeah ... this is Bowie's last "artistic" album that he would release at least until Outside in 1995. Oh well! At that, it's not especially convincing on the artistic front. It's just interesting, mostly.)

Track Reviews

It's No Game (Part 1) 10/10

This is certainly one of the album's best songs. Kinda sleazy is what this song sounds like! David Bowie gives one of his better and more spirited vocal performances here as he practically screams the lyrics (and this is even better than he did it on "Heroes")! Meanwhile, some Japanese woman is saying stuff ... I don't know what the heck she's saying, but it sounds pretty important. To top all this off, as good as any body is the absolutely wonderful guitar performance by Robert Fripp! (I don't know how David always did it, but he's managed to work with great guitar players!) Alright ... this was a great first track! Some people like this track best in the entire album, and why not? It's dang spirited!

Up the Hill Backwards 9.5/10

This song starts out all crazy but then it suddenly transposes into a more regular, slow robotic song. This is a track that doesn't necessarily sound like it ought to be good ... but somehow, David makes it quirky enough to be not only listenable but treasurable! (Man! Those guitar licks are like nothing else!) Alright ... another wonderful song! What's next?

Scary Monsters (And Super Creeps) 10/10

This one is usually a fan favorite! (More of that sleazy guitar!) This is yet another catchy track that has this great, quirky arranging that lends it an unusual and kinda unique atmosphere. Yep ... more classic Bowie. Yay! It's certainly one of my favorites. Though, I admit that it's not a *great* song by any means.

Ashes to Ashes 10plus/10

I just *love* this song! No, I don't love it more than "The Space Oddity," but this New Wave follow-up has got to be one of the man's most catchy songs he's ever done. The song opens with an electronically distorted piano and then that changes to an electric organ (I like the chords these keyboards are playing throughout the track). The melody is wonderful. Plus, during the latter half of the song, it gets more echoey and even moving! A beaut! One of Bowie's best songs.

Fashion 9/10

This is that disco song. Indeed, it would be regular if it wasn't for that crazy electric guitar which opens the track and treats us to an interesting lick at many different parts throughout the song. Nevertheless, the song itself is a fairly catchy one ... and it's danceable of course. It's kind of drugged-up disco, actually!

Teenage Wildlife 8.5/10

At this point, the album starts to get a little weak. Nevertheless, this is still a fine song. It moves on at a more pleasurable (and less sleazy) pace than most of these others. And it still has a fine Fripp electric guitar performance! It's perfectly listenable, catchy and fun ... it's just not one of the album's greatest or more significant songs.

Scream Like a Baby 7/10

Yup. This is the album's not-all-that wonderful song in it ... unfortunately, David abandons all the insane quirkiness that made all of the previous songs special. (However, it is still perfectly insane on its own right!) A little bit boring, however.

Kingdom Come 7.5/10

This is a cover of a Tom Verlaine song (who was apart of Television once upon a time). The utter quirkiness is missed ... and the song is a little bit boring ... but it's solid at least.

Because You're Young 8/10

Here, the album picks up a little bit in quality with this track that sounds very quite new wavy! Unfortunately, however, it's not really much of a bold treat as we saw during the first half of the album. It's still quite strong.

It's No Game (Part 2) 9/10

And David closes this album with a reprise of "It's No Game." I'm not exactly sure why some people don't like this version. Sure, it's not performed with as much gusto or spirit as was present in part 1, but I still like it because it sounds more sentimental. Overall, this makes a fine ending to the album as a whole, giving it some interesting closure. At the VERY end, we get these bizarre crunching noises ... as if David wanted all the crazy teenagers who bought his album think that their turntable and/or tape deck was on the fritz. Odd!

It's a stary night and ... um ... Please leave some comments here