Grin Machete

Overall Album Score: 8.2 out of 10

The mis-success (both artistically and commercially) of Never Let Me Down let David Bowie down, so it was time for a radical change of pace! Bowie spun his wheel of random music styles and came up with "blues-rock." (Ehh ... it could have been worse ... he could have chosen rap ... or cheeze-metal ... or something ...).

Indeed, this change-of-pace was so radical for Bowie that it's probably more bold and sudden than his switch from Glam to Soul and the switch from Soul to Kraut-Rock. At least those ones had metamorphic albums! (I'm a geology major ... ssssssh!) Nope, the switch from Never Let Me Down to Tin Machine came as an unexpected surprise. In fact, this really isn't even a David Bowie album! He decided to hide under the moniker of "Tin Machine" and get three other guys together and form a real rock-and-roll baaaaaaaaand. ("Tin Machine" is a cool name!!) Hunt Sales was brought in to play the drums, Tony Sales was on bass, and Reeves Gabrels (who will hang out with Bowie for all of his 90s albums) was on lead guitar.

And this is a good album! Bowie really did well here, even though this is the first time ever in his career where his songs don't sport the signature "Bowie-feel." I'm so used to getting bizarre theatrics and brilliant studio arranging from this guy ... and with this loud, moody blues-rock, I guess Bowie didn't hear much of a call for his old shenanigans. (It mightily twerped off many of his fans, though! ... Although, if I were a Bowie fan in 1989, it wouldn't have twerped me off ... Bowie needed a change. Anyway, I guess that's why he needed the Tin Machine moniker.) In spite of that, for a blues-rock album, this is actually very enjoyable. Bowie at least didn't forget to be entertaining above all else!

I think you'll actually be surprised at how enjoyable, tasteful, and fun this album is. Every song on here is a good one, making this one heck of a consistent album. They are all well written and played exceptionally well! From the beginning to the end, this album does only what it seemed set out to do: ROCK! And it does that most righteously!

Of course, I greatly prefer the signature Bowie-albums, and I never liked blues-rock. But this is wonderful! Bowie rules!

Overall Album Score: 8.2 out of 10 (This is not among Bowie's most essential albums. If it's not for any other reason, it's because Tin Machine lacks a real stunner! ... Every Bowie album has had at least one since ... since ... The Space Oddity, probably. Just the same, this blues-rock album is surprisingly awesome.)

Average Song Score: 8.0 (Good songs! I certainly won't say that Bowie has quite returned to the top of his game like his was during his Low days or anything like that, but he's certainly gotten himself out of the mud as far as Never Let Me Down is concerned.)

Album Tilt: 8.5 (This is an all-in-all cool album! Coolness'll reek out of your speakers like nothing you've ever seen before. This is in spite of the fact that blues-rock usually isn't enjoyable for me.)

Artist Rating: 8.0 (There really isn't much reason to start praising this album for having artistic merit ... 'cos this is a pretty derivative piece of plastic. Just the same, Bowie hadn't sounded this good since Scary Monsters, and it's very arguably his most consistently entertaining album since Low.)

Track Reviews

Heaven's In Here 8.5/10

This is about as far from being an original blues-rock song as I'm from China. But this 6-minute ditty is danged cool and stylin'! I'm getting a cool vibe! I like this song in spite of the fact that I almost always hate blues-rock ... I guess that's one of the benefits of being David Bowie. Even if I don't much like the song's style, the song is still cool. The wild electric guitar solo here is nice ... maybe a little bit too wild ... nor does it break new ground or anything. Reeves Gabriels is a cool lead guitarist. I suppose.

Tin Machine 8/10

This is not only the title-track, it's the band-name-track! (I don't think I've ever got to say that before ... how awesome is that?) This is another derivative hard-blues-rock song that's actually very cool. Surprisingly, I like the vocal delivery on this one more than anything. Bowie's shaky vocals are, like, the coolest things that ever existed, practically. Derivative blues-rock? I don't like blues-rock (and "derivative" blues-rock is enough to warrant a pre-emptive puking) ... but this is danged cool.

Prisoner of Love 8/10

I like dees one, too! (... Really, this Bowie guy is cool ... if you haven't realized that yet, then you're probably a chronic nerd or something ...) The primary section of this song is very well done with a great melody and a riff that compliments it nicely. The rest of it is a little bit sloppy ... but still entertaining ... and cool.

Crack City 9.5/10

REALLY cool! ... I wince every time I hear "They're just a bunch of ***holes with buttholes for their brains," but this one just misses at the ever so distinctly distinctive title of being one of Bowie's elite unknown songs. It's certainly *one* of them, having a nice melody and a sort of menacing atmosphere. (Really ... for those of you who only know David Bowie for "Changes" would be rather surprised at hearing something like this.) It's not original, but the menacing, edgy quality of this challenges the classic Stones.

I Can't Read 7.5/10

When you're a writer, it really sucks not being able to read, doesn't it? Take me for example. I'm writing stuff, but I have no idea what it says. ... Really. I'm just sitting here pressing keys on this keyboard, and it's only a coincidence that what I'm writing makes sense. Hmmmmmmm... Anyway, I really like the sort of interchange here with David Bowie's vocals and that drugged up guitar. But this song, overall, is merely "rather cool" instead of "cool" or the more distinctive "hella cool." I like it, though.

Under the God 8.5/10

This is another rapid-tempoed, menacing, and COOL song. It's really great when you listen to this loudly ... not only does it sound even cooler when you do that, you can't hear knocks on your door from irate parents! (Yay!) Another fine, fine addition from this a mazingly consistent blues-rock album. Me like! Me like!

Amazing 7.5/10

This one is slower, more dreary, and the melody is slightly lesser. Hmmhmmmhmmm. I've seen cooler.

Working Class Hero 8.5/10

Yep, folks. This is a cover of that one John Lennon song! (Bowie musta missed Lennon terribly or something ... he did a Lennon tribute in Never Let Me Down.) Don't worry, though, folks. This rendition of this song is really quite awesome. It didn't quite have John rolling over in his grave ... he was rolling and rocking in his grave! (Whenever he wasn't busy making fun of conservative dead people who don't change their haircuts very often.) It's not *better* than the original, it's just different ... and very cool.

Bus Stop 7.5/10

NO! This is not a cover of that Hollies song! (I wish it were, though.) It's not an awful song whatsoever ... it's just not anything special. Eh, it's not even two minutes long, so what do I care?

Pretty Thing 7/10

This isn't my favorite! (If you can't tell!) Although, I think this song is probably more creative than a lot of the other stuff on here, I just don't find it incredibly enjoyable! (Again ... this is great if you playing ear-splittingly loud ...) I'm not extremely impressed over this one, I'm sad to report! It's a bit messy.

Video Crime 8/10

Really, I think it's high time for Bowie to throw in some really rancid crap in this album, because this is almost getting disturbing! There was quite a lot of crap in Never Let Me Down ... what's with this? ... Oh wait, I almost forgot! David changed his image again, and thus he was temporarily out of his artistic pickle. This is another nice song with good instrument playing, and there's quite a lot of coolness in this one as well.

Run 7.5/10

This is another good song. It's nothing to get excited over, but it's still very cool. And, I like cool. Cool is cool. Cool. The riff is not great ... hmmm ... The song isn't very exciting ... hmmmhmmm ...

Sacrifice Yourself 8/10

This is another strong, strong song that's not really notable. But it's entertaining! (Yay!) And entertaining is very good. I know that for a fact.

Baby Can Dance 8.5/10

Bowie and The Tin Machine close this album with a very cool song, indeed. This is a song with a very good melody (with a rather clever rhythm-change in here) ... the dreary, drawn-out, and rather pointless instrumental interlude in here keeps this one from becoming a classic. But, overall, this song is quite entertaining and memorable.

Tin Machine say: Be merry and leave your thoughts about this album here!