Oh Mercy! I'm Bored!
Overall Album Score: 7.0 out of 10 Good news is finally here! Bob Dylan is trying to return to form! … Of course, the transition would take longer than just a single album, apparently. This album still is sub-par stuff. Fortunately, though, it’s not so danged stuck in the 80s that it’s not utterly hopeless or anything. There’s some genuinely decent songs in this one. If you want to put a number on that, there are *three* good songs on here. The rest are just boring. Some are more boring than others, but … Yeah. There’s much boringness to be had on Oh Mercy. With much crap, I really have nothing else to add about Oh Mercy. I wish it were better, but let’s face the facts: it’s not! I will close this review by emphasizing just how boring I think most of these songs are. They’re booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo oooooooooooooooooooooo ooooooooooooooooooooooriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiingggggggg!!!!! Thank you. I hope that was helpful. Overall Album Score: 7.0 out of 10 (It’s an improvement over this last couple albums, certainly … that doesn’t make this a particularly great album, though.) Average Song Score: 7.4 (There are several pretty good songs in here. The rest are just sub-par. Ho hum.) Album Tilt: 7.0 (I wasn’t aware of Bob Dylan in 1989, but if this album was actually hyped back then, it really didn’t deserve it. It’s too boring!) Artist Rating: 6.5 (Well, he didn’t go back to synth-pop. He has that little fact going for him. This is a totally unremarkable album, though.) Track Reviews Political World 9.5/10 BOBBBBBBYYYYYYY!!!! He’s so cool, isn’t he???? … Well, I guess he really wasn’t by 1989 … but at least his music ain’t so danged 80s anymore. (Really … magical things happened as the last days of the 80s were being lived…) This isn’t a perfect song … but it’s awesomely entertaining and there’s very little 80s pop production on this. Just the same, there is a ‘poppy’ aura about it … it’s clear that we’re not quite out of that hole yet. But this song has a good melody (it’s not very complex, but … that’s okay), the instrumentation is good, there are NO annoying female backup singers (and there are no male ones either) … besides that, this is kind of an exciting song, not to mention *entertaining. Yup. This is a solid one. Where the Teardrops Fall 7/10 Booooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooring. This is a slowly-paced ballad type thingy that’s alright. It has a good atmosphere … it builds up nicely as it goes along albeit this thing is really really short. But … hmmmmm … yawn. Everything Is Broken 8.5/10 Nice groove, baby! Would you like to share some of my pot, Bobby baby??? … Oh wait. This is 1989 isn’t it. Pot’s out the window, man. Ummmm … I like this song! It has a nicely constructed groove! … Although, I remember once upon a time (and in a different galaxy, too, I think) when I was impressed with Bob Dylan because of something more than how bloody cool the groove was. … Hmmm … In the back of my memory, I can remember stuff like John Wesley Harding and Blonde on Blonde … Eh, that was a long time ago. I’m pretty much enjoying Mr. Bob Dylan of 1989. Ring Them Bells 7.5/10 Hey! This sounds like a boring old church hymn! … Bob Dylan used to write music that sounded like old church hymns back in the days … back when hippies used to live in big houses together and may or may not have been wearing clothing. Oh yes. This song is alright. It’s not even that boring. Well, I take that back … it isn’t more boring than necessary. Man in the Long Black Coat 9/10 Wow!!!! Bob Dylan’s voice is really scaring me here. … I mean, his voice has always been pretty freaky, but this is genuinely sinister and spooky. What are you playing at, man???? Well … actually, this is a pretty good pseudo-60s folky number. Even though it is really scary, I really like the vocal performance! It’s super-cool. The melody on this one is all right … it’s derivative, I’m sure, but the song is rather entertaining. Most of the Time 7/10 Hmmm … Hmmmm … Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm … (I am in really deep thought) … … … I really should be grateful! Bob Dylan was real crap during his last few albums, and I’m happy that Oh Mercy marks quite an improvement … and this song really isn’t bad at all. But Dylan is seriously seeming to try to make an album like he used to back in his classic period, and all of these songs really pale so dearly to those. This song is pretty good, I suppose. The melody isn’t that great. I like how it slowly builds up its atmosphere to reach its conclusion, but … argh, this is unimpressive. What Good Am I? 6/10 There’s the poser of the decade. What good are you, anyway? Why does this song reek of boringness? … Yeah, at least it doesn’t reek of 80s, but the not-reeking-of-80s-ness can only go so far. I want some more cool 80s synths! Disease of Conceit 5/10 Again. I guess Bob Dylan spent the entire previous decade twiddling with pop-synths that he had forgotten how to be not-boring without them. Triple yawn. What Was it You Wanted 7/10 I WANT MORE POP SYNTHS, PLEASE!!!!! Oh wait … this song isn’t bad. It’s just fine without ‘em. Alright. So … ummm … this song is still boring. But at least it catches fire in the slightest sense of the term. I’m still not impressed. Pooppppp. Shooting Star 7/10 Bob! Really! I need something more exciting than this to close the album! Arrgh!!! … Hmmm … I guess this song really isn’t that bad. It’s just terribly dull. 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All reviews are copyrighted by the author, Michael Lawrence. I've got jelly between my toes.
