Gene Simmons says "WHORRF! GO BACK TO THE MAIN KISS PAGE NOW!" Gene Cinnamons Overall Album Score: 7.2 out of 10 And the third Kiss solo album that I have hereby elected myself to review is that of Gene Simmons! Peter Criss surprised me because it had a few enjoyable tunes on it. Paul Stanley shocked me because, while it sucked, it didn't suck entirely, and now Gene Simmons surprises me because there is some slightly creative stuff on here! (Yaaay!) Comparing it with regular Kiss stuff, this is pretty decent, although there are really only three good songs on here. The most notable track and, by far the best, is "See You Tonite" and the second best is "Mr. Make Believe." Both of these tracks exhibit, to my surprise and delight, a really fun-to-hear Beatles impersonation. The other song I like is the fun and infectious "Living in Sin." Other than that, there are some decent ones ... and there are not-so-decent ones. Surprisingly, though, nothing in here sucks at all. Also, as far as comparing it to the other Kiss albums, this one is quite clearly the second strongest. So... I still think these guys are much better apart than when they are together ... However, on second thought, perhaps it's for good that they didn't come up with too many more solo albums beyond this, because that would mean that I'd probably have to review them. Eeek! Overall Album Score: 7.2 out of 10 (Well ... This is certainly better than most Kiss albums. That might be something worth mentioning to the queen.) Average Song Score: 7.6 (Gene Simmons goes beyond and above his calling from Kiss and actually comes up with a bunch of mostly-listenable tracks. I guess he didn't have his cronies to enforce the Kiss's preferred crappy reputation.) Album Tilt: 7.0 (Hmmm... No. Apart from a few moments, this isn't exactly an album that I enjoy.) Artist Rating: 7.0 (There are some bits of creativity sprinkled throughout ... much more creativity than in any Kiss album ... but I'd have to be mentally insane to start praising this as being a successful artistic venture.) Track Reviews Radioactive 7/10 The dark, symphonic thing at the beginning of this is a bit of a creative introduction (for a member of Kiss) ... I mean, he was never JOHN LENNON or anything like that, but ... at least he's trying to do something slightly interesting with his music. When the actual song strikes up, it's not anything really up to more than the standards of the average Kiss song ... but it does manage to rock in a cheap way. Burning Up With Fever 6.5/10 ...This is not awful ... It's not really good, either. The melody definitely could have used some more hooks in it ... the song itself could have used more energy. It's difficult for me not to listen to this with anything but cold interest ... not that I was exactly expecting anything more than that! See You Tonite 10/10 I'll tell you that I definitely wasn't expecting THIS! A 10?!!!! Holy moly! Not only does this song have an absolutely wonderful tune to it, it's so good that it soaaaaaaars! Apart from the generally unexciting instrumentation to it, it's not really a whole heck of a lot different from an early Beatles song. Not only does this song shimmer from beginning to end, it is also unquestionably the most emotionally involving Kiss song in their entire discography ... and it is questionable whether or not these solo albums are actually apart of this discography. Oh yes. These solo Kiss albums are great ... comparatively speaking, that is ... Tunnel of Love 7/10 ...Not awful, either. The riff is pretty nice. I don't like the chorus at all (especially the female background singers) ... But the riff is pretty nice. That's all it boils down to. True Confessions 7.5/10 Again! This is not a bad Kiss-esque song. Again, I have to sit through it coldly ... not really liking it but not really hating it. At least it's not loud and obnoxious. More importantly, at least it doesn't suck. (Except the chorus, which sucks almost rancidly ... but not to the point of self-maiming.) Living in Sin 8.5/10 The beginning of this is very goofy! ... The lyrics are REALLY STUPID, but I'm really getting into that wonderfully infectious bass line ... and those silly sound effects, and the violent disjointed chants are really quite fun. I do believe that Kiss had some sense of humor ("Room Service!"), but I wished that Gene Simmons could have injected a little bit more of this into them during their glory days. (Yeah ... by these solo albums Kiss was already past their peak.) Always Near You/Nowhere to Hide 7.5/10 This one isn't bad, either! Gene Simmons, when he is alone, doesn't even seem to come up with a song that's quite a stinker. Definitely, this song is a little bit dull, but ... I'm listening to it without too many sneers. It's enjoyable to an extent. Man of 1,000 Faces 7/10 This isn't exactly a textbook example of good songwriting. I like the instrumentation here more than the melody. It's rather lavish and totally un-Kiss. And anything un-Kiss has to be good. Mr. Make Believe 9/10 This one is acoustic ... and it's totally better than the acousiticy stuff that Kiss used to do their albums. The melody here is pretty good (it's another Beatles-esque thing). It's rather pleasant, actually. How on earth did Gene pull it off twice in the same album? ... I wish he would have done more of this in Kiss ... I might not rabidly hate them, then ... See You in Your Dreams 7/10 Again ... WOW ... this is another Kiss hard rock song ... It's not GOOD, but it's not BAD. When You Wish Upon a Star 7/10 ...Okay... Unquestionably, Gene Simmons decided to do a cover of this old Disney song from "Pinocchio" as a self-parody. Unfortunately, it does suggest that Simmons isn't as witty as I attempted to hail him to be in my track review of "Living in Sin" ... but what can I say? It's better than listening to most Kiss albums. Gene Simmons might lick you do death if you don't e-mail me a comment about this album here! olequijote@yahoo.com (OleQuijote) received Dec. 24, 2004 You know, I, too, thought See You Tonight sounded like a Beatles tune.

All reviews are copyrighted by the author, Michael Lawrence. He sniffs fire hydrants.