Bulenge

Overall Album Score: 3.4 out of 10

Well! A new decade a new NOTHING. Other than taming down those drums, Kiss releases another REGULAR Kiss album. And ... man, there are some absolutely rancid songs on here. They're so rancid that it frustrates me!

Oh, geeeeeeeez! Can't I just say that this is another stupid Kiss album and end the review? I really have nothing left to say.

Okay, maybe I'll talk about the songs for a little while. I kind of liked "God Gave Rock 'N' Roll To You II" even though the concept, as you can very well understand I bet, is really dumb. Two songs in here actually got 1's. "Spit" and "Paralyzed" ... these songs are so awful that they might just as well be considered the worst that Kiss ever dared during their stupid lengthy career.

Seriously, they should never have been let to do anything beyond their 1974 debut Kiss. They STINK!

Overall Album Score: 3.4 out of 10 (Kiss unleashes their latest piece of crap onto their unfortunate audience. Only buy this if you're crazy.)

Average Song Score: 4.1 (A bunch of stupid, cocky hard rock stuff from a bunch of old guys who are no wiser than when they were young guys.)

Album Tilt: 3.0 (This has been a real pain.)

Artist Rating: 3.0 (Pff.)

Track Reviews

Unholy 7.5/10

Well, the drums aren't mixed that loudly, at least. It's not the 80s more, anymore! ... But, you know, other than that, this sounds exactly like a Spinal Tap song. It even has the same sort of vocals and structure. It's not even that bad ... but still. This song is too stupid.

Take it Off 3/10

More like Shut it Off. It's a really stupid, stupid, stupid, cock-rock. Gaaahhhhhhh! It sucks so much!!!!!!!!!!!

Tough Love 5/10

I wish that Kiss would have EVER figured out what it means to have a good melody and why other artists tend to insert that little quality into their songs. Kiss just thinks that all you need to do in order to make a good album is to make it loud and have electric guitars in it. Dribble.

Spit 1/10

No, I said: "dribble." A really bad vocal performance (sounding like Little Richard) mis-highlights this very lame attempt at updating 50s rock and combining it with modern metal. This is very very sad.

God Gave Rock 'N' Roll to You II 8/10

It starts out nicely enough: a bunch of stupid chords, a crescendo, a melody with the guitar, and then a chorus. Actually ... this is among Kiss's most convincing attempts at melodies. It's still dumb, though. An 8.

Domino 6/10

Well, I must give Kiss a little credit for discovering a need to be at least somewhat diverse in their albums. Like all their other songs, this might be stupid, but it's also kind of unique as the lead singer sort of growls out the lyrics. It's still not a good song whatsoever, mind you.

Heart of Chrome 3/10

Heart of Crap.

Thou Shalt Not 2/10

Holy cow! What's with these stupid religious references? ... That makes me think that Kiss is even dumber than I previously thought they were. Pretentious morons! This song really sucks, too. ROINOIROIENOIRENOHOIRNHOINHREHRHE. I quit reviewing altogether. I just can't take this anymore.

Everytime I Look at You 6/10

Really, I totally freaking quit! ... Okay, I don't really quit. I'm back now. The good news about this ballad: Michael Bolton didn't help write it. The bad news: It still sucks.

Paralyzed 1/10

Back to the banal cock rock. And I do mean bANAL. It gives me a head ache! Arrrgh! Kiss sure knows how to PARALYZE MY BRAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I Just Wanna 4/10

Oh man. This song might just as well have been called "Strawberry Fields Forever" after that horrid "Paralyzed." Sadly, this is just an awful song as well.

Carr Jam 1981 3/10

Carr sucks and he shouldn't jam.

Let's all hate this album together! Send your hateful comments here!

fallen_angel_986@yahoo.com (Anonymous) received March 2, 2005

The whole thing you said about Eric Carr {RIP} on Carr Jam was totally rude and disrespectful! I can't believe how horrible that was. You said you liked Peter Criss to an extent. Well Peter Criss was actually happy that Eric Carr replaced him when he left in 1980! And one more thing, being disrespectful to the dead is totally and untterly uncalled for.

gene666@yahoo.com (Fsm) received May 3, 2005

Your page is a great shit, this album rules, your bastard....