Return to the main Odds & Sods for your daily fix of philosophical thought...


Laura Boringan


Overall Album Score: 6.0 out of 10

Laura Branigan died in 2004 very unfortunately of a brain aneurysm at 47. I felt horrible about it even though I never really liked her music. I mean, I like the song "Gloria," but Branigan had nothing to do with it other than sing it with boring studio musicians.

"Gloria" was a reworking of a big hit in Italy, which sounded like an Alan Parsons Project track sung in Italian. Naturally, it took an English speaking singer to turn it into an international hit! Well, it's a keeper, certainly, although the instrumentation is boring and strictly by-the-book. That put quite a damper on the melodies throughout the effort, which weren't too bad.

The opening ballad "All Night With Me" is the album's second best track though it doesn't come close to matching Gloria's glory. The melody is rather catchy and the instrumentation doesn't spoil anything. That's more than I can say for the other tracks, which are so bland that it hurts. It hurts me because each song had good melodic elements that had the potential to be decently average songs, but the producer/arranger had no vision and didn't do anything justice! This is one flat album!!! The fact that there's only one real embarrassment in here, the appropriately titled "Down Like a Rock," makes that even more tragic!

Branigan had a capable voice, but it wasn't anything special. She could hit all the right notes, but the voice had no personality. Hey, she did look good in those sweet leather pants!! I do wish her debut album was more creative, but this is corporate-rock after all. You can't expect art from non-artists! That doesn't mean you have to like it. Thumbs down, baby! Now, rest in peace!


Overall Abum Score: 6.0 out of 10 (There's one good song, and a few others that stand as "listenable." Well, I've at least proved to myself that the late singer really isn't worth listening to. Shame she died, though...)


Average Song Score: 6.5 (Adult contemporary nonsense!)

Album Tilt: 6.0 (One big hit --- the rest inconsequential filler.)

Artist Rating: 5.5 (Just the ordinary corporate rock.)


Track Reviews

All Night With Me 8/10

It starts with a ballad. I usually think that most adult contemporary singers like to start their albums with upbeat rockers to get us off on the right start. Well, maybe Laura Branigan wanted to make us think that she was a great lover or something? Who knows? Well, the song is OK. The melody is fine, and the song production doesn't overkill. That's all you can ask for in the average adult contemporary love track! The problem is that it's not very uplifting, which is what it tries to be! The melody overextends its welcome by the end. Branigan has a decent voice, but she's no Pat Benatar I'm afraid.

Gloria 9.5/10

The biggest and bestest hit single ever! The melody is much catchier than most pop hits are, and that's why this song deserves such a high score. The song production is very straitlaced. If it were weirder, then I probably would have given it an A+ ... All these guys did was take some obscure hit from Italy had Branigan sing it with average studio musicians. Where's the art? Well, I'm tapping my feet at least.

Lovin' You Baby 7/10

Another ballad (appropriate for the third song in an album!!) but it's not a very good one. The melody is workable but the by-the-book instrumentation didn't support the melody at all. This song just grows stale after 30 second. I mean, that cheesy synth we hear every once in awhile might have made a fine gimmick, but that instrumental goes nowhere! Come on! Where's the creativity? If you keep this up, we might think you're just here for the money! .......... oh wait.

Living a Lie 7/10

The opening synth-keyboard riff rings of "Gloria," and it's obvious they were fishing for another Gloria-like hit. It doesn't work so well this time, obviously. That song worked because it had a great melody! This one doesn't. However, I am willing to give it some credit for being furious. That mood comes off more believable than I would have expected. Still, Laura Branigan is no Pat Benatar.

If You Loved Me 5/10

And now they're doing the cheesy ballad! Not that I don't resonate with cheesy ballads ... I probably like them more than I should. But this is cheesy in a bad way and in a dated way. The melody is fine but the presentation is so over-dramatic that it would have been ripe picking for Weird Al Yankovic if this were a hit.

Please Stay, Go Away 6/10

Yesh, I'm really trying to like this. Well, I can say that this has a vaguely promising beginning. The drum machine sounds interesting. It wasn't a well-chosen drum machine, but interesting anyway. The melody is just clumsy ... It sounds like a bad Meat Loaf song. It had some potential, but they didn't pull it off to well. The instrumental interlude with the dark guitars is interestingly the highlight! These guys were rushed in the studio ... it's pretty obvious. Everything's very uneven.

I Wish We Could Be Alone 6/10

This isn't the worst, but it's boring!! That's a shame, because the melody was alright. There were a few decent chord changes here and there. The instrumentation sounds like the musicians were sleeping ... or just not talented. My guess it's the latter.

Down Like a Rock 4/10

Oh no, you're not rocking, are you? This is just an embarrassment. The previous tracks might have been boring or misguided, but never embarrassing. This was meant to be a throwback to '50s music but it's just weird in a very bad way. The groove from the bass and the lead guitar sounds like a robot is malfunctioning. Branigan's voice is given an echoed effect presumably to sound like Elvis. Half of the time they insert a more usual, casual rocker, but the transition between this sections is rocky and unnatural. Rock 'n' roll disowns Laura Branigan. But God rest her soul anyway.

Maybe I Love You 6/10

And they close it with a ballad. Hopefully to raise our spirits or something to get us to leave the album on a positive note. But no sir, I'm not buying it! The melody was so-so and almost works here, but it's not nearly as uplifting as they were trying to be. I don't even get the mushy lovey feeling after hearing this. Well if a hot girl in leathery pants was singing this to me in person, it would be a different story...


Send your Laura Spammigan comments here!


All reviews are copyrighted by Michael Lawrence. He was tired once.