Sirens Are Never Good. Especially When They're Attached to Police Cars. I Would Like to Meet One of Those Odysseus Sirens, Though. They Can't Be That Awful.

Overall Album Score: 9.3 out of 10

If Roxy Music were a football team, they would be undefeated at this point! The fifth album in their rollickin' discography and it rocks more than your mother would if she were on speed (and in tight jeans). ((I'm sorry about giving you that probably disgusting image, but Freud said ...))

Yeah ... so what if this is Roxy Music finally wading comfortably in the warm swimming pool of pop music? They're still not normal! They're wearing sunglasses and a snorkel! And ... they're in the shallow end ... yeah.

And, you know, I'm not going to blame this band for wanting some much-deserved attention. Alright, the album itself only reached #50 on the American charts. But for those Artistically incompetent, Carpenter-loving douche bags, that's a pretty good score for what is still largely an artistic album. (Oops! I just insulted myself badly, didn't I?)

Also, and I cannot neglect to mention it, but this is the album that contains Roxy Music's hit "Love is the Drug." It reached #2 in the U.K. and #30 in the U.S. Yeah ... listening to the song, it just sounds like it was bred to be a hit. I think it probably ought to have done better than #30 in the U.S., but apart from weirdoes in The States (like me) who get their kicks out of artistic albums, this was the only context many Americans new them as. (I understand they reach a sort of cult following, however, when suddenly the stuff they were doing was royally deemed cool by Sir Duran Duran himself.)

Anyway, this album has Roxy Music's most popular and radio-friendly song in it. And, dang it, it's a darned cool song, too! When I first heard this song, probably about eight months ago or something like that, I could never get that really awesome bass-line out of my head! It's so tight and full of so much attitude that ... crap, it just screams out for the olden days of Paul McCartney when he was with the Beatles!

I like this album quite a bit better than Country Life, I do think (which was an excellent album), but this is far-removed from being their greatest. Nothing can, or ever will, hold a stick to Stranded. Not even your mother, who is wearing tight jeans.

(Ohhhh... I am evillllllllll! Strike up one more point for me and Siggie!)

I'd thought I'd mention something about the album cover. Their cover on Country Life was a tad bit offensive yet sexy with babes wearing see-through underwear. This time, on Siren they managed to photograph a woman who appears to be dying of hunger so badly that she turned blue. (How do you like that for yah?) I understand that the model was Bryan Ferry's girlfriend ... she must have been the cheapest girlfriend in the world 'cause Bryan obviously wasn't taking her out to dinner much! (Ohhhh! I just kill myself sometimes! ... oops. I knew I shouldn't have gotten out that butcher's knife.)

Overall Album Score: 9.3 out of 10 (It's not quite as amazing as For Your Pleasure, but the fact that I gave both albums the same score does suggest that this one is quite a bit more enjoyable. It's still bizarre, but it's not even close!)

Average Song Score: 9.3 (BLUH BAP BOO BAP! LOVE IS THE DRUG I'M THINKING OF! Oh ... sorry. I was just enjoying one of these many wonderful songs on here! Sorry. I'll let you get right back to it.)

Album Tilt: 9.5 (As one of the two actual tangible Roxy Music CD's that I own, it has proved to be a fine investment. I can listen to this album back-to-back and really enjoy it.)

Artist Rating: 9.0 (I can't totally respect it as an artistic success, but at least this is good pop music that was really thwacked hard with the artistic stick.)

Track Reviews

Love is the Drug 10plus/10

I have never been addicted to drugs (Really! I have never been addicted to drugs, except when I used to mix a little PCP into my applesauce when I was in third grade, but that was just for flavoring). But, I'm addicted to this song! That bass-line! It's one of the most infectious things you'll ever hear. I promise! It's so tight and brilliant that you'd think you wouldn't want to listen to the rest of the album. (But you do, because everything else on here is great as well ... just not as great.) The bass-line isn't only the coolest thing on this song, though. Just thought I'd make that clear.

End of the Line 9/10

Okay, the big hit song is over. But never fear! It wasn't the "End of the Line" for the album! (Oh! But what a great pun that could have been!) It's a slow and smooth song that is very pleasant-to-the-ears. The melody isn't anything but tops. The presence of a slightly drug-tinged fiddle here only proves that Roxy's still got the bloxies. (Whatever that means. I don't know. I haven't had any caffeine today.)

Sentimental Fool 9/10

Now this one really does recall the old days when Roxy Music had that fella Brian Eno in the band. It's an abstract song that just gives me the creeps! (That's a good thing, though.) It creeps you out until Bryan starts singing something, and it gets a little bit more normal, but the tune he's singing doesn't really seem special ... that is, until BAM! We get a nice chorus! Oh yes. I'm getting old Roxy Music flashbacks, for sure. And the song piddles away from there until the end. C'est very cool.

Whirlwind 8.5/10

Hah! David Bowie! (Er ... or inspiration to David Bowie. I don't know.) These two guys always shared a lot in common at any rate. Apart from the general feel I get out of the arranging, I can't picture Bowie singing the melody line. It's not 'soulful' enough, I suppose. The melody isn't the greatest thing on the planet, but with this great and quirky arranging as well at the atmosphere, I don't give a hoogadoogie.

She Sells 9.5/10

...Seashells by the Milo Field? (Oh ... I can't help that. I live in Kansas.) Hayyyy! Doesn't this song rock everything that eats sorghum? And everything that eats other stuff besides sorghum? Um ... maybe not, eh? Alright. So what if this is a discoish song? It's a heavily disjointed one! Therefore, it's cool. If I had an exclusive club for songs, it would get admittance. It's wild and wonderful!

Could It Happen To Me? 10/10

If 'it' means turning into a generic disco band, then ... um ... NOT YET, BABY!

This is classic Roxy Music at their best! Not only is this song instantly enjoyable with a great melody and infectious beat, it has utterly magnifico and interesting instrumentation! It's the best! ... Or one of the best. "Love is the Drug" is better. I don't have that short of an attention span.

Both Ends Burning 8.5/10

It's less infectious ... the melody probably won't have you tapping your toes or anything, but it's still a hugely enjoyable song! Though, it might just be the worst track in the album. Oh heck! There's no 'worst track' here! Billy Joel has had enough of those to cover Roxy Music until New Years 2025.

Nightingale 9/10

We're back to the cool infectious stuff! It's even weird and stuff! I've got to dig these wonderful instrumental interludes in here. They rule all. (All, as in the laundry detergent.) Ohhhhhh! This is only more good Roxy Music to my ears!

Just Another High 9.5/10

And the Roxy Music close this wonderful album with a mid-tempoed, cool song that'll just have you wetting your pants like a good appetite. (I'm sure that "Siren" on the album cover could use a good appetite right now.)

Ole? Leave your comments here!

slb23@shaw.ca (Simon B.) received July 24, 2004

I just got this record a few days ago, and I think it's one of the better 70's Roxy Music studio albums. It has good sound quality and good songs. Speaking of songs...
Song Ratings:
1. Love Is the Drug (9)
2. End of the Line (8.5)
3. Sentimental Fool (8.5)
4. Whirlwind (8)
5. She Sells (7.5)
6. Could it Happen to Me? (6)
7. Both Ends Burning (7.5)
8. Nightingale (7)
9. Just Another High (8.5)
Album Cover rating: (7)
Album Rating: 77.5/100 (77.5%)