See what else is sucky about Styx at their main page... Diceapair Theater Overall Album Score: 8.3 out of 10 I always thought this was Styx’s greatest achievement. When I was a misguided music lover and a Styx fan, I enjoyed this album to pieces, and the feeling never totally rubbed off me. Yeah, it is a concept album. It is a concept that might have worked, but … eh, it’s probably best to forget that Styx tried doing a serious concept album in the first place! … But it starts off nicely. The album opens with a short and pleasant piano piece that glistens with nostalgia. … Unfortunately, they feel the great desire to repeat the song two other times in the album, and those instances don’t come close to measuring up! Anyway, the second song is in the typical form of Styx. It’s bombastic, loud and devoid of passion. But … it’s enjoyable. Very enjoyable, if you can believe it! … The melody is solid and Dennis DeYoung’s vocal performance seems exhilarating instead of simply geeky and annoying. “Too Much Time on My Hands” follows, which is easily among Styx’s top five catchy melodies. It’s a pop song that plays on the radio, but it’s a good one. “Nothing Ever Goes As Planned” continues in that same vein … If you’ve been counting so far, that’s FOUR STYX SONGS THAT I COMPLETELY LIKED!!!!! IN A ROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! … Do you know what this could mean? … Yeah, I bet you know … WORLD PEACE! … That’s not the case, however, because that’s precisely where the album slumps off and never recovers. “Best of Times” revisits the same melody on “A.D. 1928” and expands it in a way that’s too much Styx. “Lonely People” is dull. “She Cares” is emotionally void. “Snowblind” is so-so. “Half-Penny, Two-Penny” shows enough promise, but it’s too shakey in quality. And then “A.D. 1928” plays for the third time … and it sucks the third time. …But the final six songs aren’t bad. There wasn’t a song in there that was a total misfire! There were misfired portions in those songs, but … it ain’t the same thing! Look closely, my friends, this is the closest Styx ever got to a masterpiece. I already know that their next (and final during their “classic” period) album sucks. Overall Album Score: 8.3 out of 10 (The best that Styx ever did.) Average Song Score: 8.4 (It starts out with a bang, chock-full of catchy melodies and nice ideas. It slumps off at the end … but it doesn’t start to smell.) Album Tilt: 8.0 (Inconsistent, but it’s nice most of the time. The “concept” didn’t really work, though.) Artist Rating: 8.5 (For Styx, this is their crowning achievement.) Track Reviews A.D. 1928 9.5/10 …If you’ve been following the Styx discography in chronological order, and you suddenly listen to this song right after barfing during the final moments of Cornerstone, you’ll probably be pleasantly surprised at this very short but very sweet-natured piano piece. The melody of it is probably among Styx’s finest … and it doesn’t show much glitz. (Of course, the song has self-importance, but … the nostalgic sense of it is, in a nutshell, well done.) Rockin’ the Paradise 9/10 You knew it was gonna happen. Styx Glitz. The electric guitars flare up in commercial glory and Dennis DeYoung starts singing loudly. …… Yet, through something that can only be explained by magic, the song is actually quite enjoyable. The melody, while it’s absolutely nothing you’d want to consider brilliant, is actually pretty good. The instrumental interlude, though totally generic, is completely enjoyable … WHAT??? I’M ENJOYING STYX????!!!! NO!!!! *Spits bad tastests out of mouth* Too Much Time on My Hands 10/10 It’s the radiola-classic! … It’s quite catchy, actually. It features a nice, almost synth-pop groove backing and DeYoung sings a very catchy melody. … The instrumental interlude is totally emotionless, but enjoyable. I really can’t find anything to dislike about this. Quite easily, this is among Styx’s finest moments … and they really didn’t have a lot of those. Nothing Ever Goes As Planned 9.5/10 WHAT THE CRAP????? SHOULDN’T STYX HAVE CRAPPED BY NOW???? … What’s more, this song features some generic tropical-esque grooves and a by-the-book brass section, which I usually find nauseating, but … Styx actually does it right here. The album is purely pop, but it’s nice pop. … These guys surely learned a thing or two about melodies … in a suspiciously short period of time … The Best of Times 8/10 The same tune from “A.D. 1928” is resurrected here … It doesn’t add a whole lot to the melody, but … it’s still pretty nice. It’s not the greatest thing in the world to write a song and repeat it more than once in an album, but … whatever. This version comes with an actual chorus, though. I cannot qualify this new part as an excellent song, but … it’s still a crapload better than the stuff in Cornerstone. … Did Styx release that atrocious album so that the critics would finally start gushing praise on this relatively ingenious follow-up? … Perhapsssssss Lonely People 7/10 I don’t like the beginning of this song much at all. Some guy playing the saxophone in an apartment complex somewhere and another guy screaming at him to shut up. … And it’s raining. Was Dennis DeDoodie trying to go for the whole Pink Floyd thing? … Yeah! Don’t go there!!!! … When the actual song starts, it’s not very promising. Kind of bland … but then it picks up a bit as DeYoung gets a bit more passionate. The chorus isn’t very good, but … let’s not forget that this is Styx! … But in a bold, un-Styxian-like move, they insert an instrumental interlude in which part of it is actually interesting. The synths they choose is shaky and unstable … makes some pretty good listening! After that, it gets dull and Styxian again. … Eh, I have to give this song a 7. She Cares 7/10 Happy … ummmm … The melody is altogether decent, but … there’s not enough hooks in it! Also, even though the tone of the song is happy, listening to the song doesn’t genuinely make me feel “happiness.” … These are arguments that I never would have thought to brought up in Cornerstone, but … heck, I have to explain my 7’s now. It was a pretty solidly excellent album up until now. Snowblind 7.5/10 Dull … but not bad. The song starts up slowly and softly that exposes some of Styx’s progressive roots. … It then pipes up into a typically bombastic chorus that I don’t care about … but it’s not nauseating or anything. Half-Penny, Two-Penny 8/10 Nicely done riff! … It’s a bit too late to start bringing up arena-rock songs, but … whatever. It has a good riff!! The chorus isn’t very good, though … I don’t know what it is with Styx and their choruses, but they can never seem to get those right! They’re always loud and bombastic, but rarely enjoyable! … The instrumental interlude is really BORING in this song, especially. I’m not even sure if you can call it an “instrumental” interlude, either! It’s just a bell, the occasional chord and someone talking in the background … BORINGGGG!!! The electric guitar solo to follow, however, is better than their guitar solos have been. … So, the 8/10 is for the riff and the guitar solo. Everything else is take it or leave it. A.D. 1958 8/10 This is the THIRD time the same theme from “A.D. 1928” piped up. … And this is the worst one … The only reason for that is probably because they tried giving the song a more concluding nature and … they just weren’t into it. State Street Sadie A short (26-second) old-timey instrumental involving the piano. Um … it’s pretty nice, actually. They probably didn’t have it in ‘em to expand it into anything interesting. Styx or tricks? Discuss here!

All reviews are copyrighted by Michael Lawrence. I am alone. You know I am no stranger. Old rules are a bore.