Four Runts in My Life

Overall Album Score: 8.6 out of 10

FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE I would like somebody to tell me what the freaking crap is the crap crap crap crap crap wrong with all these crap people and their crap crap and I don't crap even crap want to crap on their crap because of their crap and their crap and they have some sort of enormous inferiority complex and they think I actually listen to them.

But never mind! I'm here to stalk about Stevie Wonder. He's probably the coolest guy who ever roamed the earth. I don't say that about everybody, you know. Do a Google search on "He's probably the coolest guy who ever roamed the earth." ... Yeah! I said that about nobody except for Stevie Wonder. That is recorded on the Internet.

Oddly enough, even though Motown Records owned his soul, Stevie manages to write and perform some really good material. Of course, since it's Motown, none of this stuff is daring whatsoever (unless being in remarkably good quality is daring), but there's no filler on here, either. My preconceived biggotry toward Motown Records is the label is so dull-blurned commercial that any actual Motown ALBUMS will contain a lot of filler. I haven't done a point-and-study research project on this supposition, but if we're looking at For Once in My Life by Stevie Wonder, I can take these notions right back down to the crap crap crapper where it belongs.

I really enjoy three of these songs on here. ... Well, I pretty much enjoy 'em all, but there are three in particular that are *the* awesome. The title track is a really good R&B pop song that's both catchy and dramatic. "She-Boop-Be-Do-Be-Poo" is another good song, even though it has an awful title. The grand tamale of them all, however, is "Sunny," which is ... WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

In conclusion, Stevie Wonder can quartifly my greshnies any day of the week.

Overall Album Score: 8.6 out of 10 (Stevie Wonder's not-debut is a good one! The album consists of well-written material, and passionate vocal performances! ... A song on here might even have the corniest lyrics in the world, and Stevie's overflowing passion will get him foaming at the mouth.)

Average Song Score: 8.7 (GOOD SONGS!!!!! There's really no filler in this. Sure, there's some generic stuff, but no song EVER on his album sounds like Stevie Wonder didn't give it his ever-loving best.)

Album Tilt: 8.5 (More of a laundry line of songs than an ALBUM, but ... it's still good.)

Artist Rating: 8.5 (Well... I probably should give it an 8.0, just because so many of these songs sound sooooo generic. But a good handful of these are among the best in the genre.)

Track Reviews

For Once in My Life 10/10

For once in my life, I would like somebody to tell me exactly what chicks dig about guys who get up on stage in front of an audience, play a piano, and sing a song. How is that any less dorky than ... ohhhhhh ... say me, who gets up on a chair in front of a computer, listens to somebody play a piano (or an electric guitar or a tambourine or something) and writes? ... Yeah! It's not any less dorky! Yet, Stevie Wonder is the one who gets all the babes. ... What's with this guy's name, too? "Stevie Wonder?" Huh???? I Wonder what his real name is? Well, I looked on the Internet, and I discovered that his real name is Steveland Hardaway Judkins. That name doesn't sound normal, either. I think his parents must have been so dazed from the delivery process that they forgot they were just finished creating a human and thought they discovered a new continent on a long sea voyage. ... But I digress. Who'd ever would have thunka thata somea guya nameda Steviea Wondera whoa worksa fora Motowna Recordsa woulda bea anya gouda? (****CRAPP**** It's just been pointed out to me by Mr. Spock of the Starship Enterprise than I'm being annoying and not much else. I must use logic! I must stop it! And! Stop! It! I! Will! Kirkout.)

For Once in My Life 10/10

For once in my life, I wish that somebody wouldn't have personally called me at my home and told me how brilliant this guy named Stevie Wonder actually is. I mean!! This is a good song! A very good song! In fact, I'd go to the point where I'd say that this is a very very good song! ... When you get right down to it, even, you'd realize that this is only one of those cheap-crap Motown soul ditties that were created merely to fund some rich guy so that he could afford to buy a sexier pool cleaner for his neglected wife. .............. Okay. That has nothing to do with anything. Uhhhhhh, this is a good song. Good melody. Good soul in the vocals. Good sound. Good good.

Shoo-Be-Doo-Bee-Doo-Dah-Day 10/10

It took me about this song's entire duration to make sure that I typed the title correctly! (*$((*#*$*#($****$(*%(*($#(#($*$(#(@))@(#*$*% ... Okay, I don't have much time, so I'd better get right down to it. This is another soul-pop song that has a really nice melody. I really dig that electric piano!!! ... I also like the melody. It's reaaaallllyyyyyy catchy and whatnot. Uhh Huh.

You Met Your Match 9/10

Even when we get to the non-hits, Stevie proves to be a Wonder. ... HR*R**G*R**HR**JR**R*R*GJR**RJ*G*RJ*JRG ......... (I'm feeling goofy tonight to say the least. I'm not drunk, I swearrrr.) The melody isn't quite as perfect sounding as those previous two (or three possibly) ditties, but this is still great! Un-filler-y.

I Wanna Make Her Love Me 8/10

Still good! Wonder sure knows how to singgggggggggggg. He sings all soulfully and stuff ... like a good African-American rock star is supposed to.

I'm More Than Happy (I'm Satisfied) 8/10

I'm scratifieddd tooo............................. This is, yet, still a good song! It might be no hit, but it's not **$*.

I Don't Know Why 9.5/10

I don't know why I CAN'T SEEM TO SETTLE DOWNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!! ARGHHHHH!!!!!!!!! ... (okay. I need to go do some Zen. I'll be back in 40 minutes or so ... OH F*R$()# WHERE ARE MY ENYA TAPESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS ... Oh, there they are. They're where I put them last. In the garbage can. One minute. I'm going to go Zen.)

...*40 minutes later*

Hello, good people. I like this song. It is splendid. I don't know what this Stevie Wonder guy is getting so worked up about here. He sounds like he's troubled. Stevie Wonder needs to Zen. And, you will stop asking such questions. Because questions don't matter, ultimately, in life. Only answers. ... And I don't have any of those. (CRAP! WHAT ARE YOU DOING READING THIS SITE? I HAVE NO FREAKING IDEA WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!! AND I TOTALLY LIE TO YOU! DO YOU REALIZE THAT? I DIDN'T ZEN! WHEN I WROTE *40 minutes later* THAT WASN'T 40 MINUTES! THAT WAS LIKE 3 SECONDS!!!!!!!! I DIDN'T DO ANY OF THAT! CRAPPPPPPPP!)

Sunny 10/10

Screw the hits! This is an even greater song than all those hits times 2939. (Yeah, that's a mathematical fact too. I took it to some geeks. *me, in one of my personalities*) Anyway, this is a really nice mid-tempoed song with a tune that is JUST WONDERFUL. ... Yeah. This is a great song. And it even has those great dramatic vocals ... how old is this guy, again? He was 18, wasn't he? BASTARD! ... I mean. Good for him.

I'd Be a Fool Right Now 8.5/10

Foo! .... FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFOOOOOOO FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOF FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFOOOOOOOOF FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOF FOOOOOOOOOOOFOOOOO FOOOOOOOOOFFFFFFFFOOOOOOOOF OOOFFFFFFFOOOOOOOOOF FOOOOOOOOOOFFFFFFFFFFFOOOOO FOOOOOOOOOOOOFFFFFFFFFFOOOOOOOOOO (I'm clearly in no state of mind to review Stevie Wonder albums. I think you'd better just read the all-music guide, because I'm really being a total ass. No wonder I can't get babes.) ... Oh! This is another good song! Woowooooo!

Ain't No Lovin' 8/10

Yeah. I really care about your stupid WOMAN!!! Why don't you make me more jealous??? ... Oh! This is another another good song! Wooowoooo! ... This hardly the album's highlight (and ... dude ... this is getting just a teeny bit generic, don't you agree?). SO KEEP YOUR BABES TO YOURSELF!

God Bless Her Child 7/10

Oh, Stevie, Stevie, Stevie. Your song still doesn't stink, but ... this is getting rather drab, isn't it? ... Do I smell filler? ... FILLER???? ... Well, no, this is not filler. There remains a MELODY and those stringed arrangements are nice. I guess.

Do I Love Her 8/10

Man, you're so corny. What's wrong with you?

The House on the Hill 8.5/10

Funk! (Did I tell you that most of these are funk songs? Don't you see what you have to put up with? I really suck as a music reviewer. You don't deserve this.) Even though this one does sound kinda generic, I still like it. It has so much energy! For a corny guy who works at Motown Records, Stevie Wonder sure is an energetic guy. Heck, you'd almost think that this guy would have been famous.

For once in my life, send me some comments about this album here!