So You Want Their Phone Numbers or Something?

Overall Album Score: 9.4 out of 10

So, as I was sitting through Uncle Meat and listening to it ... a lot ... I was wondering to myself: "WHY AM I DOING THIS????? IS THERE GOING TO BE ANY PAY-OFF????" Thankfully, I got the answer pretty quickly, and it was affirmative. My reward for sitting through that exhausting Uncle Meat is Hot Rats, a fantastic album by all accounts. Not only does the album contain Zappa's entertaining experimentalism, but it's also very accessible. I'm even willing to argue that it's loads more accessible than Cruising With Ruben and the Jets.

This is one of Zappa's most universally beloved albums and, in some circles, is considered better than even We're Only in it for the Money. If you ask me to tell you which of the albums I like the best, I'll choose Hot Rats without a moment's hesitation.

Hot Rats is very enjoyable. In fact, if it weren't enjoyable, I wouldn't like it very much. (Ah, I wish I could simply enjoy music for the art, but that wouldn't be enjoyment. That's appreciation.) Part of the reason for that is that it isn't difficult music such as Uncle Meat or even We're Only in it for the Money. These are a bunch of instrumentals that jam most vivaceously. Even though rock jams aren't accessible by their nature (after all, it's just a bunch of musicians with egos showing off), what keeps this whole album going are actual *RHYTHM SECTIONS*. There's a steady drum beat in all of these tracks and even, sometimes, a danceable bass guitar. Even the 17-minute "The Gumbo Variations" is kept very enjoyable with the bass-line.

Of course, the rhythm sections and the basses aren't what the listener is going to marvel at! It's the marvellously inspired solos in here. Be it the masterful electric guitar solo in "Willie and the Pimp" or the dizzying sax solo in "The Gumbo Variations," there is always something that'll make you drop your bottom. ... I drop much bottom listening to this awesome thing. Very awesome.......

Anyone who wants a good album to rock out with that's also intelligent should pick up Hot Rats.

Overall Album Score: 9.4 out of 10 (YAY!!!!!!!!! FRANK ZAPPA MADE A GREAT JAZZY ALBUM THAT I CAN LOVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Believe me. My happiness over the matter cannot be underestimated.)

Average Song Score: 9.2 (These are some extraordinary jazz-fusion rock jams!)

Album Tilt: 9.5 (I up this score, because the album's weakest songs are also the shortest. They also don't really tend drag the enjoyment of the entire album down very much.)

Artist Rating: 9.5 (Man, this Frank dude ............... whoah ...)

Track Reviews

Peaches En Regalia 10/10

Oh yes... now this is a very well-orchestrated instrumental piece from Zappa. Not only is the melody typical-Zappa, but he actually seems to have given this song a lot of care ... whereas some of the songs in his previous albums (such as Uncle Meat) seemed rather tossed off. There are a lot of instruments present here. Some are interestingly chosen synths and others are more traditional such as scaled pianos. Various instruments come in and do improvised-sounding solos. A drum keeps the beat steadily through the whole thing, so this is quite accessible. There are so many interesting sounds throughout this entire song that ... yes ... it *is* possible to love Frank Zappa after all.

Willie the Pimp 10/10

This song embodies to me the whole jazz-fusion thing ... "Peaches En Regalia" didn't strike me as extremely jazzy. But this song is jazzy. And there's nothing like some good ELECTRIC GUITAR jamming. This electric guitar is playing through this whole nine-minute song, and I'm like ... THANK YOU. The electric guitar is, like, a great instrument. And when I get to hear it play some most-inspired jazz-rock piddling, then I am happy. This ain't no Iron Maiden guitar solo. This guitar is played like a piano or saxophone would be played in jazz. Anyway, I'm truly spoiled with this one. I never even *halfway* get tired of it through the entire nine-minute duration.

Son of Mr. Green Genes 9/10

Frank Zappa borrows a melody from Uncle Meat from himself, and it's sure as heck done better here. Although, I still don't think that melody was so great to begin with. The real attraction with this incarnation is, naturally, the nine-minute jazz piddling around after the formality of introducing the theme during the song's first minute is over. ... Geezzzzzzzz, I love this stuff. They're jamming out. I'm enjoying. They're obviously enjoying it. And it goes on for nine freaking minutes and ... I only get *slightly* bored this time. They seem to try to be very exciting at the end, but ... it's not so inspired like they were probably shooting for. But so what? WHOOROOOOTOOROROO??? This song still rules. There's some really fantastic instrumentation in here including a rather brief Cream-inspired electric guitar solo.

Little Umbrellas 8/10

What's this? A three minute song? ... And it's slow! Unfortunately, there's nothing really for me to latch onto here. The steady drum beat helps, but there's a lot of sounds going off and ... seemingly with little purpose. ... There are some good bits of instrumentation in here, but I can't be too thrilled about this one.

The Gumbo Variations 19/20

Yay! A crazy saxophone solo! ... Seriously, if I were a rock star, I'd pepper a lot of my songs with crazy saxophone solos. I mean, Mott the Hoople's "All the Way From Memphis" is awesome because of the solo. And, here, we get the crazy sax solo for ... um .................... seven minutes straight. And then, after that, we get an equally crazy violin solo and crazy electric guitar solo ... for the remaining 10 minutes ................... geez, this is one lengthy song! Like the previous songs in the album, Zappa keeps things very enjoyable by inserting a very strong rhythm section. Of course, we're left to marvel at the sax solo, but it's the rhythm that's keeping my tribal instincts happy by giving me something to tap my foot with. And what can I say that's bad about this? It's a jazzy jam and ... apart from this Mahavishnu Orchestra stuff I listened to a few months ago, how can this really be topped? There are just so many musically interesting ideas in here and it doesn't relent until this 17-minute track is finished. (And they all go freaking nuts at the very end of it ... this really is quite an entertaining track.)

It Must be a Camel 8.5/10

I guess this song reminds us that this is from the same Frank Zappa that gave us Uncle Meat! It's another hugely experimental song that sounds really sloppy, but there are some interesting ideas in here. Particularly at the end, where there's some good piano. ... This is one of the weaker songs of the album just because it doesn't sound relatively as inspired as the other tracks. However, these overly experimental Zappa tunes are easier to swallow in small doses such as this.

Oi! What do you think of Hot Rats? Too much pepper? Send your opinions here.