LIST OF ARABESQUE REVIEWS:
Arabesque: Friday Night (1978) / Arabesque II: City Cats (1979) / Arabesque III: Margiot Bay (1980) / Arabesque IV: Midnight Dancer (1980) / Arabesque V: In For a Penny (1981) / Arabesque VI: Caballero (1981)
Arabesque: Friday Night (1978)
Track Listing:
Hello, Mr. Monkey C+ / Fly High, Little Butterfly B+ / Someone Is Waiting For You B / The Man With the Gun B- / Six Times a Day B / Buggy Boy C / Friday Night B / Catch Me Tiger C+ / Give it Up B- / Love is Just a Game B
Confession: I am a douche. Or at least I was eight years ago when I 'discovered' this uber-obscure Euro-disco group and decided to give them a right old scouring on my website. I remember the reason I did this: If I review too much good music without also reviewing bad music, I might cease to appreciate good music! Since then, I've discovered that I'll never stop appreciating good music, and there's always going to be an infinite supply of it. This leaves me to try to correct the sin I made all those years ago when I needlessly bashed Arabesque.
So here it goes: In reality, Arabesque are a perfectly OK Euro-disco group.
Note, however, that this particular album doesn't feature the 'classic' line-up. Michaela Rose is the only classic member here. She would be joined with Jasmin Vetter and Sandra Lauer (later Cretu) for Arabesque II. For now, we have Heike Rimbeau and Mary Ann Nail to complete the trio.
The album begins with “Hello Mr. Monkey,” which did drive me crazy when I first listened to it. These days, I hardly recognize it as a detriment to my ear drums, but its hooks and groove are very stiff. I'm surprised that one turned out to be the big hit in Japan as opposed the others. I also don't understand why, in the chorus, it's stated that Mr. Monkey “should have been a clown” even though they state in the verses that he was formerly a professional clown. Did they mean Mr. Monkey should try to get back into the business? (See what this guilt-trip is doing for me? I have to take this stuff seriously now.)
English is apparently the international language of pop music, and--being an English speaker--I'm cursed with the ability to understand the lyrics. Their fan-base was concentrated mainly in Japan and the USSR, so it's really only a minority of Arabesque listeners who understand what they're saying. Here are some of the lyrics to “The Man with the Gun.” He was caught and in jail / There were tears in his eyes / And I kissed them away / Though he said: It's unwise”. Is that unwise because his tear ducts excrete poison? If so: Awesome.
But who cares about lyrics? The international audience loved these guys because the songs themselves were catchy and danceable. I, in total contrast to the review I wrote eight years ago, even attest to actually liking a few of them. “Fly High, Little Butterfly” is my favorite. The ladies sing the chorus in such a way that it actually seems soaring. I like that they use a saxophone that blares as opposed to sucking like a vacuum, ala Kenny G. Most importantly, John Travolta told me personally that he approves of its disco beat. Granted, the song is nowhere NEAR as soaring as ABBA's “The Eagle,” but I'll count it as a perfectly decent little sister.
Other songs that keep my foot atappin' and have agreeable melodies include “Someone Waiting For You,” “Six Times a Day,” and “Friday Night.” The worst I can say about them is they are more or less forgettable. But at least they're fun, and they're also orchestrated well for disco songs. (I mean, they don't seem sappy or anything... I prefer Arabesque to The Bee Gee's Spirits Having Flown, for instance). “Love is a Game” is a ballad and thus the album's lone non-disco moment. The verses are bland, but there are hooks in the chorus that grab me unexpectedly. ...The cheezoid Euro-pop moment here is "Buggy Boy," which features a cutesy bubble organ that plays very stiffly throughout and kind of makes me gag a little. Otherwise, I notice some nicely executed vocal harmonies in there, so even the most offensive song here isn't a total waste.
Another thing that happened to me since originally reviewing these Arabesque albums is that I sat through Steve Coogan's The Tony Ferrino Phenomenon. I believe this experience has affected me profoundly. 8/15
Arabesque II: City Cats (1979)
Track Listing:
Peppermint Jack C+ / In the Heat of a Disco Night B / Rock Me After Midnight B+ / Lucifer's Lover B+ / Dancing in the Fire of Love A / It's So Hard to Leave You B / Hell Driver B+ / City Cats B / Don't Kiss a Crocodile B+ / Plastic Heart B. BONUS TRACK: Hello Mr. Monkey B-
Do you know what I mean by ultra-cheezoid Euro-pop? Listen to the first few seconds of “Peppermint Jack,” and you'll know what I mean. It features a verrrrrry cheery and bouncy electric organ, and whoever wrote it sounds like he or she was trying to emulate the dreams of somebody who overdosed on cotton candy and passed out. If you're born 'n' bred on Ted Nugent and Motorhead, listening to a song like “Peppermint Jack” will most likely kill you. I will give the song this, though: After the initial shock of listening to something so godforsakenly cute, I almost start to get caught up in its vibe. It makes me think I should put on a red-and-white striped vest and paper hat and join the cast of a European 1970s children's show as the creepy ice cream man who always smiles.
Oh, and this is where we get Arabesque's classic line-up of Sandra Lauer, Michaela Rose and Jasmin Vetter. Sandra Lauer, the new lead singer of the group, is probably most famous for being in the '90s new age group Enigma. But who knew she started out with such humble beginnings? She has a much more difficult time enunciating words in English than whoever it was she replaced, and she also sings like she's slurring or something, as though she could only barely manage to eke her way to the note that she was aiming for.
I once accused Arabesque of stealing the riff from The Beatles' “Get Back” for “Hell Driver,” but there must be at least 10,000 songs that use a similar riff. (It's not a very complicated riff.) ...But wait, are you saying there's a riff in that thing? ...In other words, rock 'n' roll? Yeah! It also has a heavy drum beat, a chorus that can be compared to arena-rock, and some surprisingly gruff electric guitar. With that said, it's far closer to ABBA than it is Aerosmith, but it's not bad!
Maybe the first Arabesque tune a pop-rock fan should hear is “Dancing in the Fire of Love,” which is such a cool song, and I'm not even kidding. It starts with a huge, blaring horn section with some fuzzy guitar injected into it before breaking into an infectious, danceable groove. It's such a shame that the lyrics are such nonsense! I mean, the title alone sounds like it belongs on a Spinal Tap album.
Another good song is titled "Lucifer's Lover" and is perhaps the ultimate proof that they never even tried finding an audience in English speaking countries. I mean, how am I not supposed to think it's about one of Arabesque ladies' aspirations to give birth to the Anti-Christ? ...Well, rest assured, it's far closer to the story of Eve, but anyway, that's another legitimately good song with good hooks and gets a pretty good groove going.
Another song with a bad title is “In the Heat of a Disco Night,” but it's well played and has a toe-tapping groove (that was maybe slightly 'borrowed' from The Bee Gees' “Stayin' Alive”). Unless you have an aversion to disco or something, you'll probably like it. “Don't Kiss a Crocodile” is another song designed for the disco-dancer crowd; it's cutsy for sure but the hooks are infectious (especially the chorus that grabs me), and I like listening to those shooting-star synthesizers someone programmed. “Rock Me After Midnight” actually uses the exact same bridge ABBA used in “Money, Money, Money.” Although it's interesting the more I've gotten used to that song the less that fact has managed to stick out at me like a sore thumb. The album's closing track, “Plastic Heart,” is OK; it sounds like Blondie's “Atomic” except it isn't quite as hooky.
Oh man. Am I really going to do this? While this album is far from perfect, it's entertaining enough. So... er... here you go, Arabesque album: 10/15. My original review dubbed it a 2, so this is the most significant rating increase that has ever occurred in the history of Don Ignacio's Music Reviews. And unless I suddenly decide I love Madonna's American Life or something horrendous like that, it's unlikely that record will ever be surpassed. (Keep this in mind for when my website becomes universally famous and that question pops up on Trivial Pursuit.)
Arabesque III: Margiot Bay (1980)
Track Listing:
High Life A- / Jingle Jangle Joe B+ / Roller Star A- / Bye Bye Love B+ / Margiot Bay B / Parties in a Penthouse B / Once in a Blue Moon B+ / Hey, Catch On B+ / Take Me, Don't Break Me B- / The Only Night Was a Lonely Night C /
I don't understand how this could have happened. Did Mr. Monkey hit me over the head with a sturgeon? Did Peppermint Jack slip a mickey in my sweets? Did the Man With the Gun figure out what television channels I watched and infuse them with subliminal messages? I listened to these albums quite a few years ago and just hated them. But now it feels like I'm turning into the weirdest fan these guys have ever had. Oh sure, a lot of these silly bubblegum tunes are too much for even my (bubblegum-immune) system to handle, but wow! Many of these songs are a blast.
But don't be so fast counting this as an undisputed classic of 1980; as is typically the case with silly, bubblegum-type songs, they tend to lose their flavor after just a few listens. For instance, it was only 24 hours ago exactly, I remember thinking that violin part in that disco-dance tune “Bye Bye Love” was utterly melting my heart. (I went for a hike in a local park, and I had that violin part running through my mind and somehow mashed together with the gruffy guitar groove from Prefab Sprout's “Faron Young.) But it has worn off on me already! Like a pop-music sugar crash.
As a whole, I'd say Arabesque improved things from their previous album, if slightly. If nothing else, I hear evidence that our favorite German princess--Sandra Lauer--took some voice lessons and seemed far better enunciating English words. I also find some of this genuinely well written. “High Life” sounds like a Village People song; it has a catchy tune with plenty of spirit and a strong and soaring chorus. “Jingle Jangle Joe” is ABBA-esque featuring some relatively complicated chord changes and some keyboard passages that remind me of “Mamma Mia.”
If you know anything about weird fads from the late '70s and early '80s two things come to my mind: disco and adult roller skating. Well, Arabesque decided to combine both of those things to produce “Roller Star,” my vote for the best song of the album. Oh that chorus is so cutesy that it's ridiculous... But what the heck? Isn't it far more fun to join in the spirit of things than it is to sit on the sidelines and mock things? (Wouldn't it be fun if an indie-pop band released a side album featuring nothing but Arabesque covers? They'd get a whole lotta nerd-cred. At least from me.)
“Hey Catch On” has a slight '50s pop flavor and gets some energy going, but it does tend to run out of momentum by the end. “Margiot Bay” reminds me a little too much of “Chiquitita,” but it's a perfectly harmless pop ballad with a sweet chorus. “Parties in a Penthouse” and “Once in a Blue Moon” are perfectly passable Euro-disco tunes even though neither really sticks to me after they're through playing. “Take Me, Don't Break Me” was an attempt at some Kenny-Loggins-ish new wave with some heavier drums, growling pop guitar and a bubbly electric organ... But when it comes to this band, hooks are everything, and they're just not that strong in that song. I almost always prefer new wave to disco, so their weak lone attempt at it here disappoints me profoundly. “The Only Night Was a Lonely Night” is a slow, 'uplifting' ballad (with one of the band's legendary 'perplexing' titles), but it unfortunately never catches fire and thus bores me.
As a whole, this is an enjoyable album, but let's make sure we call it for what it is: Disposable. Most albums I've reviewed from this era have managed to endure through time, and moreover it seems that they were intended to endure through time. Arabesque hasn't; they were a group that merely capitalized on the trends of the era. As soon as the next new thing rolled around, they were just as quickly forgotten. (That is, apart from people who have generated a nostalgic attachment to them, and weirdos like me who seek out these sorts of leftover bits of moldy cheese left in the back of pop-music's refrigerator.) But anyway. Let us enjoy life while we still can. Let us embrace Arabesque. 10/15
Arabesque IV: Midnight Dancer (1980)
Track Listing:
Make Love Whenever You Can A- / Keep the Wolf From the Door A / I Don't Wanna Have Breakfast With You B / Nights in the Harbour A- / Hey What a Magic Night C / Midnight Dancer A- / Hi Hi Highway A- / You Win, Hands Down C+ / Black Out B- / Born to Reggae B+
I've had “Make Love Whenever You Can” stuck in my head all week, and it's been on the verge of driving me nuts. So even though I'm giving this album a fairly high rating, I'm going to urge you very strongly to stay away from this band like the plague unless you're prepared to get bubble-gum Euro-disco songs stuck in your head.
However, if you like the musical equivalent of pure sugar cane from Euro-disco bands who were popular in Japan, then I highly recommend this album! This is also hands-down their best album for several reasons. First, and most importantly, it has their best album cover of all time. I mean, in all their other covers, they look like mannequins (at best) or blow-up toys (at worst) who were sporting the most ridiculous fashions of the era. But here, they're wearing elegant brown dresses and lounging about, looking utterly classy. The other reason why this is their best album is the pop songs are remarkably good. However, don't take that to mean Arabesque did anything different. Arabesques I through VII are very similar to one another. It's just that IV happens to have the higher concentration of good songs. (Spoiler alert: They would abandon disco in favor of synth-pop in Arabesque VIII.)
If you're a male Arabesque fan from 1980, I hope you didn't take Arabesque's very blatant promotion of male promiscuity too close to heart in “Make Love Whenever You Can.” (Make love whenever you can / Believe me baby / Not every now and again / I tell you baby / Make love whenever you can / You'll be a newborn man) ...That's right; I'm suggesting Arabesque gave a few of their fans AIDS. But at least they got an infectious Euro-disco song in the bargain. I also find that song kind of amazing, because it has two choruses. It starts right away with its most infectious one in which the girls sing “Make love!,” which is followed by the cutest synthesizer line I think I've ever heard in pop music. The second (and probably the real chorus) is far more boisterous and rather cabaret-ish. But that one's also catchy.
Sandra Lauer wasn't an especially great lead singer, but maybe saying so isn't being fair, because the only other singers I have to compare are the incomparable Anni-Frid Lyngstad and Agnetha Faltskog. I will say, however, I like that growl she brings to her voice throughout “Keep the Wolf From the Door.” I mean, hearing that rrrrr coming out of her mouth is the cutest thing imaginable. That combined with an especially driven Euro-disco beat makes that by far my favorite song of the album. Also, the melody is infectious, but not infectious enough to eat away at my braincells like some of these other songs, and I appreciate that.
“Nights in the Harbor” is another brilliant ABBA rip-off. Listen to all those excellent chord-changes throughout the song--there's even a harmonically complicated and rather dramatic build-up to the chorus, which is very reminiscent of the structure of “Mamma Mia!” “Midnight Dancer” is rather odd because it has a VERY heavy synth-intro that reminds me of an early '80s news station's identification theme, and that becomes incorporated into a typical Euro-disco groove. And this groove is just about the most infectious thing I've ever heard.
“Hi Hi Highway” blatantly rip offs Chic, but like their ABBA rip-offs before it, it's a very good rip-off. Also, by default, that song wins as the most danceable (and classy?) Arabesque song ever released. I'm also surprised I enjoyed “Born to Reggae,” even though something tells me that three disco singers with thick German accents weren't actually born to reggae. No matter: The hooks are solid, it's instrumented well, and--most shocking of them all--it's not cheesy in the slightest.
But one thing these girls really hadn't been doing well in their albums was '50s rock throwbacks and new wave. There are three of these types of songs here, and they're horrendous. “You Win, Hands Down” has the most ridiculously irritating intro of any pop song I've ever heard. I mean, I think I'm hearing a kazoo there. “Hey What a Magic Night” isn't a whole lot worse, but at least they use annoying saxophones there instead of annoying kazoos. “Black Out” is more tolerable, but I still find its '50s rock overtones far more limp than energetic. Oh, why must Arabesque make songs like these?
But anyway, this Arabesque album isn't perfect. It wouldn't even have been perfect if it didn't have those three songs on it. What else is new? 11/15.
Arabesque V: In For a Penny (1981)
Track Listing:
In For a Penny, In For a Pound B / The Hero of My Life B / Like a Shot in the Dark A- / Run the Show B / Indio Boy B+ / Billy's Barbeque B- / The Doctor Likes Music B / The Rebels of the Bounty B+ / Let's Make a Night of It B / I Stand By You B-
Wow, this is disappointing! (That's right: I've come so far in my ability to appreciate this second-tier Euro-pop band that I can actually conjure disappointment from one of their records.) I mean, where on earth did all those cheeky and insanely catchy Euro-dance numbers from their previous album go? There's nothing on here that I find even remotely as addictive or as delightfully cheeky as “Make Love Whenever You Can,” or “Midnight Dancer,” or “Nights in the Harbour” or “Hi Hi Highway.” ...It is also for that reason, I'm positive there would be quite a few listeners who'd prefer Arabesque V to any of their previous: It's not quite so obnoxious.
That's relatively speaking of course. And anyone who would describe Arabesque's previous records as obnoxious probably wouldn't bother even dabbling in their other albums. I also can't so conveniently ignore this album has the upbeat Vaudeville-styled number “The Doctor Likes Music” and the ridiculously silly Euro-pop/Tropicana hybrid “Billy's Barbeque.” So even their least obnoxious album still wouldn't let you off too easy.
I might also add that the blatant disco numbers are starting to fizzle out here; as a whole, this album is far closer in style to ABBA's The Album than it is to Voulez-Vous. I suppose disco wasn't as hot in 1981 so they were veering away from it. But it was still far too soon for these guys (i.e., pop music's least innovative musical group) to go synth-pop, which still had a year or so before it was mainstream. There are nevertheless a few disco tunes in here. One is called “Let's Make a Night of It,” which is buried as the penultimate track and has a beat you can tap your foot to and an OK chorus, but it's relatively underwhelming. The lead single for the album was the disco-ish “In For a Penny, In For a Pound,” which reminds me a little too much of “Hello Mr. Monkey” in that the melody isn't too interesting and its main groove is quite stiff.
The fact I can listen to these songs without having the wrenching feeling of wanting to upchuck my breakfast proves these guys have successfully whittled down my hard exterior and have exposed the mushy pulp inside. As I've been saying all along, Arabesque are a band best suited for people with cultural ties to Japan. If you've ever seen the opening or closing credits to one of Japan's 80,000,000 anime shows, you probably know what many of their other songs sound like. “The Rebels of the Bounty” for instance has a cute melody, tightly harmonized vocals, and bright instrumentation. All they need to do is shorten it (not a bad idea), re-record the lyrics in Japanese, and they'd have another theme song to one of their one-billion programs.
“Indio Boy” is basically a clone of ABBA's “The Piper.” Although interestingly, I believe that one is far closer to genuine European folk than ABBA's version, which was only pretending. Maybe the lamest song of the bunch is the closer “I Stand By You.” It's not a poorly written song per-se, but it tries its hardest to be an uplifting, life-affirming ballad, but it's completely flaccid. Come on, if you want to change my life with your songs, you have to give them more umph!
Anyway, speaking as a newly converted Arabesque fan, I'm not too excited about this album. If they aren't being ridiculously cheeky and catchy and instilling the bizarre desire to get out a feather boa and start dancing to their songs, then I miss the point of listening to them. I'll give these songs credit all the way till Sunday for being well-written pop songs. But I'm pretty sure I'd say the same thing about The Bay City Rollers. 9/15
Arabesque VI: Caballero (1981)
Track Listing:
Caballero B+ / Why Do You Ride the High Horse C+ / Tall Story Teller B / Touch and Go B / Don't Wait For a Sailor B- / Hit the Jackpot B / Look Alive B / A Flash in the Pan B / Fool's Paradise B / The End of the Show A-
This is a similar story to Arabesque V. It ranks as one of their most consistent efforts, if not most consistent effort, but lacks an especially addictive single. Don't you know how much I want there to be more songs in the world like “Make Love Whenever You Can?” That song makes me want to put on a leisure suit, a feathered wig, and join a dance party with similarly dressed European dudes. I might even let a few of them peck me on the mouth before I start slapping them on the cheek. (...Sorry, that's a very inappropriate pop culture reference to Will Smith that I'm not deleting for some reason.)
I took this album with me for a walk yesterday afternoon, and—while I note there isn't anything remotely annoying here—the experience of it just bored me. For sure, this is hardly the first time I've been bored with an album. But this is Arabesque: If I don't get their stuff the first time, I never will. It's not like these songs will ever grow on you with repeated listens. (Well, I wrote an old review of this album panning the daylights out of it, but I wrote that completely closed off to the notion of listening to second-rate ABBA clones.)
I will say this, though: The execution of this album was top-notch. I mean, listen to that blaring trumpet in the Latin-inspired “Caballero.” It sounds like that thing could rip through a crowded stadium at a bullfight. The rest of the song is orchestrated almost exactly like an ABBA song (surprise, surprise!). But it's surprisingly pretty close to matching the instrumental quality of an ABBA song: it has an appealing mixture of high-pitched synthesizers, strumming acoustic guitars, ringing electric guitars, and clean and powerful drums. Even though these guys hadn't even an ounce of ABBA's songwriting inspiration and charisma, it's nice their producers took the time and effort to actually orchestrate these things. Another song with a strong Latin influence is “Fool's Paradise.” It's not bad, but I forget about it pretty quickly. ...But I'm interested why there are two Latin songs in here. Were they hoping to find an audience in Spain or something?
When it comes down to it orchestration really isn't even that important. I'd rather listen to a wheezy voiced teenager with a harmonica and out-of-tuned guitar if his melodies interested me more. And perhaps it was just a crazy fluke I liked songs like “Make Love Whenever You Can” in the first place? (Or maybe I'm starting to live up to that Vapors song?) It might be kind of interesting for you to hear Arabesque's “Look Alive” in conjunction with ABBA's “Why Did It Have To Be Me.” They're so similar to one another that they're practically the same song and yet ABBA's version gets liftoff while Arabesque's version isn't anything more than simply being a nice song.
In good Arabesque fashion, many of these songs are unintentionally hilarious. “Tall Story Teller” appears to be about an old man affectionately called “Ballyhoo” who hits on young women by spewing fantastic stories at them. I've got to say, even though the song is the most cheezoid of the Euro-pop numbers here, that's an outrageous idea for a pop song. (“He says that Rockefeller became a millionaire / 'Cause he taught him the tips and he taught him the tricks”) Those lyrics raise a whole slew of questions. The first being why ole Ballyhoo isn't taking credit for the notorious billionaire's entire fortune. The next question is how old did someone have to be in 1981 to have been able to teach Rockefeller anything? 160? Later on in the song, the narrator admits to actually loving this man and plans to marry him sometime. However, she warns him: “Be sure if you ever gonna tell me a lie / I'm saying good bye to you.” ...European women must be psychopaths.
I really shouldn't pay attention to the lyrics. (And yet they're irresistible!) Weirdly, the best song on this album by a mile is one that was written specifically to close it: “The End of the Show.” Or perhaps the song was only written as a tidy way to close their concerts. It's oh-so-cheesy, but it's oh-so-good. The melody is sweeping and memorable, the orchestration comes fully equipped with syrupy strings and scaling pianos. And the rhyming is funny, too. (“We really felt at home tonight / We hope you like our show alright / But now it's time to say goodnight.”)
Are any of you actually thinking about buying Arabesque albums from reading these reviews? If so, then save this one for last. The pop songs are fine and are orchestrated surprisingly well, but the album really needed a few more glowing hits on it for a recommendation. 9/15
Arabesque VII (1982)
Album Score: 5
GURRIETIHNGMTIEUROGNEOPEORIP!!!!!!!!!!!
That's the monkey talking. It's been about three years since I reviewed the first Arabesque creation, and Mr. Monkey is still picking at my brain. Thank goodness I graduated college a few months ago, or my GPA would have really slipped.
And now here I am *eyes begin to well* subjecting myself to this bad Europop music for a reason that I forgot. *cries louder* I HATE MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ........ OK, I should promise myself to not commit suicide during this review. I know that's a difficult temptation to resist, but ... I promise myself here and---HEY, BRAIN!! I SEE YOU EYEING THAT BOTTLE OF PILLS!!! YOU ARE *NOT* GOING TO MAKE MY HANDS REACH FOR THE BOTTLE!!!!!! (It's good that I need both of these hands to type...... all this incessant typing saved my life.)
So, what's it with this group, anyway? Despite that I lived a decent amount of life between Arabesque albums, I still haven't found the answer to what they needed gas turbines for. But at least there's a few good turns on this album that's worthy of a mention. True, nothing too excellent enough to have received anything higher than an 8 and that's why this album doesn't quite rank as their best. But the supporting material is slightly better (as well as the truly dismal nonsense down there such as "Prison of Love" and the tropicana "Surfing the Bahama."
Some songs like "Moorea" and "Zanzibar" had some nice ideas, instrumentally, but the melodies were so dull and derivative that it robbed the song of any potential. As far as choosing a best song goes, I'd definitely have to pick the album opener, "Why No Reply?" Yes, it's a disco song released in 1982, but it steals enough from ABBA to be engaging.
And with that, I say...... uhhhhhhhhh .... nice costumes?
Read the track reviews:
Arabesque VII
Arabesque VIII (1983)
Album Score: 5
Now I've reached a stage in my music blogging career when I want to start being relatively useful. Not so much insightful, but just constructive. With the exception of Arabesque VII I wrote three or four months ago, the other Arabesque reviews came from the days when I was trying to be funny and not useful whatsoever. (Really, that was one of my original aims as a reviewer. I can't be smart like the other reviewers on the 'Net, so I'd might as well be entertaining. Except I was never that entertaining.)
But then I was thinking, how am I possibly supposed to be constructive about Arabesque? A hopelessly cheap and corny ABBA rip-off???? I originally chose then so that I could rip into them like a jackal preying on an especially weak gazelle. Now I have a desire to apologize to it and try to get it back on its feet........... But what the heck am I supposed to actually do with this band? I wrote all the track reviews on this album with the most apologetic mentality possible, and .............. Well, geez! What do they want from me??? The best song on here is "Dance Dance Dance" but it only gets the distinction because it hilariously reminds me of a cheap '80s workout video.
I could try pointing out other "good" aspects of this album, but I'm really stretching matters. Even the Marc Anthony reviews I was working on just prior to this --- if he came out with an album like this, I would rip it to shreds!! ... Well, at least Arabesque prove to me that they're better than The Countdown Singers, but not by much.
Read the track reviews:
Arabesque VIII
